This Day…

 Have you ever dreaded a date on the calendar? I mean when you look at the calendar on your desk and that particular day just seems to glare at you, mock you, and laugh at the hour of its arrival. It is almost as if an audible voice taunts “you cannot escape my coming!” Oh, how pathetic I may seem to even openly confess this. I have to believe that I am not the only woman that has felt this way! There must be other’s…there has too. If not than I am left to ponder exactly how alone I am in this.

My dreaded day this year is my birthday. May 20th. I have never felt like this in my whole entire life but something is seemingly different about this year. I have not accomplished all that I thought I would at my age. I find myself feeling as if I have to put one part of my life on hold in order to play catch up with the other half. I even heard someone say that the new middle age was 25. 25! That must put me in the category of…well, old! Can anyone relate?

I even lied about my birthday. I spoke of my new job in another post and part of my “side duties” is to keep up with everyone’s birthday. I post a little flyer by the sign out board we have and try to make it colorful and fun. Everyone really likes it because on the bottom of the flyer it always reads “Celebration will take place on the 3rd Wednesday of the month with donuts!” So, naturally one of the employees inquired about the empty wall where I post the flyer. He left in disbelief that there was no birthday’s this month. I went along confirming that there was no birthday’s this month. It was very disappointing because birthdays mean donuts! Silly I know.

I love how God talks to us in the midst of our silliness. If I continue to look behind me and focus on what I have not done then I miss what He has for me in the future. If I focus on the things that I “wish I had done” I don’t notice the things that God has done for me now, in the present. I quickly realized that I was allowing what I thought I should have accomplished to define me. I was measuring myself and my worth by worldly standards.  My accomplishments or success do not define me and the same goes for my mess ups and failures. I shook my head in disbelief that I allowed these asinine thoughts to invade my mind. I did not pay attention to what I was thinking and they slipped right on in. I didn’t take hold of my feelings when I first felt them and how quickly they led me to places in my mind that I did not want to go.

At the end of my life the only thing that really matters is who I allow to define me and that is Jesus Christ. I want my every being to resemble Him. At the end of my life it doesn’t matter the material wealth or possessions that I have acquired or what kind of title I carry in front of my name. At the end of my life I want only this to be said of me…

My Wife…

My Mother…

My Daughter…

My Sister…

My Friend…

She followed Jesus with all of her heart.

My friends, at the end of the day that is all that matters.

Lord, Thank You for every year you allow me to celebrate the day of my birth. I will celebrate each day because it is a gift from You. In Jesus Name, Amen.



One thought on “This Day…

  1. Tessa August 19, 2014 / 9:47 pm

    The abiltiy to think like that shows you’re an expert


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