“Simon Peter, a servant and an apostle of Jesus Christ, To those who through the righteousness of our God and Savior Jesus Christ have received a faith as precious as ours” 2 Peter 1:1-2 (NIV)
Conversation with God….
I was talking with the Lord one day when I suddenly realized that I do not remember what it was like not to have Him with me. What I mean is the moment you are saved your body becomes the temple of the Holy Spirit. I was saved at the tender age of 6, so, since then I have had the indwelling of the Holy Spirit living on the inside of me.
When I walked away….
Don’t misunderstand me. I know what it is like to walk away from God but HE NEVER LEFT ME! Like I said, I was saved when I was 6 years old. A marvelous day it was and I will never forget it. Unfortunately, as I grew up, the experiences of life and the pain it brought started to lure me away from my love of God. I questioned the character of God. I started to question if there even was a God. When I turned my back from the Truth of who God was and what His Word said I opened the door for more pain than I could ever imagine. I walked into a lifestyle that I thought would help stop the pain but it did just the opposite.
The Holy Spirit was with me….
The Holy Spirit was there every step I took; urging me to turn back to God. “Urging” is too light a word. The pain of my sin before me was so great but instead of repenting I tried to mask that pain as well. Hide it! As if anyone can hide from God. It was an ugly, vicious cycle I found myself in.
Those who bear witness….
When I would be dragged to church (yes, I mean literally dragged) the hand of the Lord was so heavy upon me that I wanted to run. I felt discomfort like I had never felt before. So, what did I do? I would like to say at this point I turned from my sin but I didn’t. I did the what a lot of us do. I avoided church.
Whenever I was around Christians who lived a godly life there was the hand upon me….pressing. I wish I could tell you that I learned from their example and repented. I didn’t. I determined in my own heart that I hated Christians.
I do want to make this one thing known. At this point in my life I had many people around me who called themselves Christians. These Christians lived the same as I did and I never felt the Holy Spirit convicting me of my sin when I was around them.
Repentance equals Freedom….
Fifteen years I played this cat and mouse game with God until I could play no longer. I was tired and there was no more fight in me. I collapse on my face before my Savior and poured all the garbage before Him. All those years I was searching for freedom from all the years of pain and I found it in those few precious moments. God is so patient with us. He was so patient with me. The very thing I was running from should have been the thing I was running to. I was free.
Our faith is precious….
That decision I made so long ago was the best decision I will ever make in my lifetime. Although, at the time I did not know it. I did not value my salvation, my relationship with Christ as something to be valued; precious!
As the realization fully came to me I was in awe. I have never NOT had Jesus with me. The Holy Spirit constantly convicting me of my sin because He knew God’s plan for me and it was so much better than the way I was living.
Oh, precious ones, how I have to rejoice and praise the Lord for the gift of my salvation. It is so very precious!
There is a spiritual lesson to learn here.
Why do you think it was so easy for me to walk away from God?
Dig into the Scripture and see what it says about “falling away”. Hint: Look up Hebrews 3:12-13. See what the Scriptures say about “soil” in Mark 4.
Do you see yourself in any of these passages of Scripture? How about when you read about the soil? Are there any changes that you need to make in your life? Any sin to confess? Maybe, beloved, it is you that have turned from God and desperately want to be whole again. Turn my friend. Don’t wait as I have done. I wasted so many years. Jesus has His arms wide open waiting for You. He can wash you clean. Run to Jesus. His gift of salvation is precious.